She called me yesterday.....we were talking after a long time or rather i can say, i felt so. There was a time when we used to feel it's too long if we dont talk for two days but the times have changed. This time it is surely more than four days, not just two or three days, so i thought nothing wrong in feeling it's been too long.

After talking for some time, she praised me that it's been long time that i have irritated her with my words. Ohh thatts good!! But then, suddenly i realised it may not be because i'm growing wiser but rather because i'm not getting enough time now a days..so i thought there is no need to pat my back on this issue.

I also told her that i made a resolution this time not to irritate her or any one else this time when i'm going there. It used to be common that i go there only once in a while and even then the time just melts off with our fights and complaints only and we realise our stupidity only when it's the timefor me to start from there. Then we realise that we could have spent that time more wisely rather than with stupid fights. I'll go there exclusively to spend quality time with them but foolishy waste the time what i have in complaining about the time which i dont have. Last time only i decided very strongly that i'm not going to repeat this. It's not the first time i decided. Every time i make that decision and every time i forget it, but this time it's strong decision, not just decision.

I could sense there is some change in me. I'm not as excited as before with the thought of going there. The excitement and count down used to start from the time one month before my journey date. But this time, not even one week is there, but still i could not sense any trace of excitement in me. Is this change in me because of my previous experience of unmet expectations or is it because of my decision to not keep much expectations (so that there will not be any disappointments) or is it because the purpose of this visit is somewhat different from earlier visits or is it because i am slowly forgetting the joy in beng non senical or is it because i'm trying to restrict my freedom of being nonsensical in the guise of growing wiser?!?